By Mrs Jenny Gillespie, Counsellor

Self Regulation 

At this busy time in the term many students may feel tired and tense and this can lead to frayed tempers, emotional outbursts and more challenging behaviours at home.  Learning how to manage demands and emotions is an important developmental task for teens and understanding the role of self-regulation can assist parents in this regard.

What is Self-Regulation?  

Self-regulation develops slowly over time and is the ability to understand and manage your own behaviour and reactions.  Self-regulation incorporates physical, emotional and cognitive processes and helps children and teenagers learn, behave well, get along with others and become independent. 

Why Does Self-Regulation matter?

As young people learn to manage their emotions, they feel more confident, capable and in control. They have stronger relationships, are more able to pay attention, learn new concepts and can cope better with the normal stresses and disappointments of daily life.

Self-Regulation in Adolescence?

By adolescence, the part of the brain associated with emotions, impulses, aggression and instinctive behaviour (amygdala) is well developed. However, other parts of the brain associated with the ability to plan, think about the consequences of actions, solve problems and control impulses is not fully developed until the mid-20s. 

For this reason, young people are more likely than adults to:

• frequently experience strong emotions (particularly anxiety and anger)
• act on impulse
• misread or misinterpret social cues and emotions
• engage in risky behaviour
• make decisions based on how they feel at the time

Families can support young people’s self-regulation development by:

• De-escalating teen emotion
• Talking with teens about different ways to manage uncomfortable or upsetting situations
• Talking with teens about strategies to use when they’re feeling out of control
• Helping teens to express their emotions in healthy ways
• Exploring the immediate and long-term consequences of actions
• Explaining how people will have different reactions to events depending on their circumstances.
• Role-modelling problem-solving skills

Further information @  Self-regulation in children & teenagers | Raising Children Network